Those Impacted
The ripple effect is bigger and wider than anyone sees.
The ripple effect of a betrayal of trust is deeper and wider than anyone sees.
Spiritual abuse doesn't occur in a vacuum and it doesn't only wound a few people at the center of a controversy. It moves through a congregation—and almost no one escapes untouched, whether they know it or not.
The ripple effect spreads like a fracture. It shatters those who've been directly harmed. It is amplified for those who stood closest to the seat of abuse. It breaks trust within the congregation. And far too late, it confirms the suspicions of those who left but never had a name for what they sensed until now.
Most of the time, it surfaces because something breaks it open—a resignation, a disclosure, a report, an arrest, a whistleblower who finally speaks. Far too often, at the center of that breaking-open, are patterns of bullying or control, sexual misconduct, or clergy sexual abuse—sometimes against an adult under a pastor's spiritual authority, sometimes, devastatingly, against a minor.
Your Experience Matters
You may be trying to figure out if your experience counts. Chances are...it does.
The confusion, grief, and anger you're carrying is real. The disorientation is real. And the ways this journey is touching your relationship with God are real too.
Wherever you're standing when the news reaches you, we hope these pages help you recognize your own experience. Whether you're a direct victim, a spouse, a board member, a team leader, a pastor left picking up the pieces, or someone who has walked away, disillusioned or disappointed—your story matters.
When spiritual abuse is woven in alongside the fabric of the good news, kindness, and community—its exposure can send shockwaves through those within its wake. Whole congregations can be groomed not to notice—not to recognize what's happening.
But he was so kind!
She helped my daughter through a difficult season.
He led me to Jesus. How could he do this?
How could I not see it?
Your story matters. And even though God's people failed you, that doesn't mean God failed.
He loves you. He wants to restore you—and His church.
God does some of His most beautiful—most profound—work in the midst of brokenness.
Your story is no exception.
Circles of Impact
This graphic maps the reach of spiritual abuse—who it touches, how close they stand to the harm, and why the impact is different and profound for each circle.
The Circle of Impact worksheet is available as a free download for you or your community. Feel free to share it with church leaders and others who may be walking through a similar experience.
Those Impacted
Beyond the Church Walls
The aftermath of spiritual abuse does not stop at the church doors.
Beyond them, a whole community is watching. People who once saw this congregation as a place of light and truth. Friends who knew some of the people involved. Neighbors who noticed the silence, or the news.
They carry something too—disillusionment, maybe, or a quiet grief for what they thought the church was. Some of them have walked away from faith entirely.
If that's you: your disillusionment is not the end. It's an honest response to something real. And Jesus—the very One whose name and authority have been misused—Jesus never abuses our trust.
He is still the way home.
A truth-filled apology will contain a majestic quality. A concession, on the other hand, will lack that freeing quality. It does more to confuse than heal because it doesn’t name specific wrongs, so you are left feeling unsure of what the wrongdoer is taking responsibility for. A concession is frustrating because it makes you wonder if they really “get it.” And it traps you because refusing to accept the “apology” will likely lead to further tension.
- Wade Mullen
Something's Not Right: Decoding the Hidden Tactics of Abuse